Bad Trip

Mirror, mirror on your eyes who is the truest of them all.


We reflect ourselves in the eyes of others. What we see in ourselves we presume to be true in others. When we are good we expect others to be so. Bad and cynical we treat other the same way. If we are gifted we assume everyone has their dose of “Promil Milk” too and as good as we are or even better.


Sir Isaac Newton and John Nash is never a good teacher – they usually stand in the corner of the class blabbering all sort of arcane and complex theories expecting students to comprehend them as they do. Students usually prefer average teacher knowing too well that they can better explain and illustrate ideas to average students. A trusting person usually doesn’t count change while a leery will always check.


Why do we get disappointed in dealing with fellow humans when the outcome is not what we expect? In reality the disappointment is from within, something is telling us that we are wrong to be too trusting and too good. We cannot accept the truth that others are so indifferent with what we feel and what we are. Our mistaken view of the world is what disheartens us.


We begin to ask, to question, to seek answer, to our own premise about human nature. How others could be so mean, so cruel, and so heartless? What have I done? As we begin to answer these questions. We begin to grow, we learn and we grow old. We learn that indeed the eyes of others may not reflect our own.


This is the critical point of whether we want to remain as an actor or reflect back the awful image we see in others. Do we want others to be part of our psyche or do we want to remain free and be ourselves? Most humans do change and sometimes for the worse. To remain who we are in spite of all the soreness is the difference between living free and forever be slave to the whims of others.


Free yourselves and live your life.

Florante at Laura

“O pagsintang labis ang kapangyarihan,
Sampung mag-aama’y iyong nasasaklaw
Pag ikaw ang nasok sa puso ninuman
Hahamakin ang lahat masunod ka lamang.”
- Francisco Balagtas, 1788-1862


Aaah Love! (deep sigh) Hmmmm…. I’ve memorized the quote when I was in high school and never forget it since. I love to fall in love and loved many times. For if the essence of life is love, then I have lived a hundred lives. It’s nice to read the blog with background music of Rod Stewart’s “Love Hurts.”


Was Guinevere right to kiss Lancelot? Is it fair to love someone but marry another? Unfortunately, the answer to both questions is YES. It has something to do with the unique configuration of our brain romantic love and attachment to someone is activated from different region of our brain – they are independent of each other. Consequently we could love someone and then spend the rest of our life with another person.


Helen Fisher, anthropologist and well-known love researcher from Rutgers University, says that "...The human body releases the cocktail of love rapture only when certain conditions are met and ... men more readily produce it than women, because of their more visual nature. ….this fire in the mind is caused by elevated levels of either dopamine and phenylethylamine or norepinephrine or both, as well as decreased levels of serotonin."


What the heck are these chemicals? Sure don’t know what they are but I would appreciate it much if somebody can give me a shot of serotonin to counteract the increasing dopamine and “whatever chemicals” that’s messing up my neurons lately.


Romantic love originates close to the part of your brain that controls your heartbeat, breathing, and other internal organs. This happens in the subconscious part of our brain – the reason why we sometimes fall in love with the wrong person. As they say we can never choose whom to love. It is love who chooses for us and we can only hope that the person it chooses love us back. This is the most nerve wracking experience of all. We go to high heavens or pawn our soul to the devil if only our beloved will return our feeling. The passion for love is greater than hunger. How sorrowful can it be when our love is never acknowledged? Unrequited love is state of being that I dare not even venture to explain for words are not enough to describe the depths of anguish that we go through. Why do we have to suffer for something that’s beyond our control? Only God knows for “the heart has reason that reason cannot know.”


How do we tame our unruly heart? We can’t… We just can’t… We really can’t… I’ve tried and failed – a lot of times at that. Sorry to disappoint you folks but that’s the way life is. We just have to sit it down, wait and cross our fingers that the chemical imbalances in our brain subside soon.


However, there is a way to trick the brain out of our own misery. The brain cannot distinguish between reality and fantasy it’s the five senses that makes that distinction. By constant daydreaming of our beloved we somehow fulfill the wishes of our subconscious mind and thus minimize the damage. The key is to make one’s action innocuous while under the spell of love.


Hope it works.
I’ve tried it,
Was a bit successful,
I sure look stupid.
But hey, what can’t kill you can make you stronger…..

First Knight (1995)

A movie by Sean Connery, Richard Gere, and Julia Ormond demonstrate the malady of love and the wreck it can bring.

Guinevere: Love has many faces. I look on you differently, but not with less love.
King Arthur: When a woman loves two men, she must choose between them.
Guinevere: I choose you.
King Arthur: Your will chooses me. Your heart chooses him.
Guinevere: My will is stronger than my heart.
King Arthur: Do you think I put so high a price on my feelings? They'll pass.
Guinevere: My will holds me to my course through life.
King Arthur: As mine does me, and yet, all I have to do is look at you and everything I ever believed in fades to nothing. All I want is your love.
Guinevere: You have it.
King Arthur: Do I? Then look on me as you looked on him.
Guinevere: I gave one moment to Lancelot.
King Arthur: Yes, you're innocent. But you love him! Any more of this innocence and I'll go mad.
Guinevere: I'll do whatever you tell me to.
King Arthur: I don't know what to think. I no longer see my way ahead. Only fools dream of the one thing they can't have.
Lancelot: Forgive me.
King Arthur: What's to forgive?
Lancelot: I dreamed the dream of you. It was a sweet dream...... while it lasted.

Mysterious and powerful – resistance is futile for love can obliterate any opposition. No one is immune it comes and goes according to its whims. It can make a pauper out of kings or humble the proud to beg on their knees. We are under the mercy of love. One way or the other there is no escape sooner or later it will catch up on us. Better to confront it with the knowledge that somehow we can manage this common affliction of all human rather than wait in the dark and be caught under its clutches.

So what is love but a state of mental incapacity when our brain releases chemicals that overwhelm our thinking neurons and bring us in state of complete bliss. Akin to drug like morphine or cocaine we literally get addicted to it. As much as we want get rid of its effect in our brain – the body crave for it. We need it as much as we need the air we breathe. Love is the only legal drug that cost nothing but is so powerful that it can ravage us for life. We humans are designed by nature to fall in love and reproduce. Understanding that love after all is the presence of chemical imbalances in the brain that put us in the state of ecstasy making us unreasonable and sometimes commit acts we will never do under a regularly functioning brain. Subconsciously our brain seeks out the source that triggers the release of these chemicals. Our body craves the feeling and it wants more of it. Thus, a person in love will go to great lengths and almost exhaust all means in his disposal just to see and or be with his love.

Think of it as drug addict stealing, robbing, and committing crimes just to have another dose of drug. And you get the idea how strong love can be in making us absolutely irrational and focused in being together with the one we seek.

Is there a way out of this? Yes there is as much as addict can be rehabilitated so are love-struck can be tamed. But this is reserve for the next blog. :-)

Devil's Advocate

I've been thinking lately about devils and why do people curse one other as the devil or evil or satanic wherenever they don't like what they have done. Hmmm... Lately, I realize that these are insult to the devil using their name to refer to us. In all respect Lucifer and his organization is the one most successful organization in the world - that is if you believe in the devil. Members of this organization are disciplined, they have a single-handed purpose of decieving man, they are committed, they help one another, they are blind obedient to their leader, they share information, and are never selfish always willing to lend a hand. In other words they are all-for-one-and-one-for-all organization. Man could only marvel at the sophisticate tricks, means, and resources that the devil can employ in achieving its goals and objectives of leading man astray. There is no power struggle, no backbiting, no treachery among them, there is no war, nor famine, everyone is helping one another, just plain goodwill and brotherhood in their own way.

If only man can reach the level of organization and camaraderie the devil have achieved the world would have been a better place.

Now I wonder... if its a complement or a curse to be called a devil. But somehow being called a devil is a way of deriding our sworn and worst enemy in more aspect than one in general they are more successful than us. You only have to see the real world to see the proof of their success... :-)

Education

One day after lecture I chance upon a boy age about 9 to 11 peddling peeled mangoes. I asked him why is he not in school. He replied "My mother asked me to sell these mangoes instead of going to school." Perplexed, I wonder how can a mother do such thing to deny the child his right to education. Then as our conversation went I realize that there are more things this child can teach me than I will learn from my readings. In fact he made a perfect example of what opportunity cost is all about. His mother thought that one day outside of class is one day of earning roughly about 50 pesos of additional income for the family. An earning opportunities worth the absences from school for the poor child.

I begin to question my own assumption of what education is all about. Do we really need to go to school to learn? Or is hands-on street smart education a better alternative to education. The answer is it depends on your purpose. If your ends is money and you use education as means to achieve it, I believe you are better off not going to college but instead start your own business as soon as possible. But if your purpose is higher than money your best bet is to pursue education in its fullest extent.

I always told my students before that the best definition of education I encountered is in the movie Titanic, when Jack told Rose something like "I have 20 dollars in my pocket and I know how the world works. Come with me and will be alright." Learning how the world works is really what matters most when you are out there and nobody to turn to. In the ends its not what you know that matters its how you use what you know.

Seek Your Own Self-Interest

"One of the most encouraging thoughts is to know that man can change through conscious effort." I forgot who said it. When you walk through Marawi you see a verse from the Quran that states something like "God will not change the condition of the people unless they change their own." Those who have gone to various countries more developed and peaceful cannot help but wonder why we can't do the same on our own.

Is there a magic potion that could bring us to development? Do we need a savior to save us from ourselves? Can the people change by themselves? What do we really need as a people?

When you ponder the possibilities that you as a professional can do a lot to provide the next generation a better future, through your effort and contribution - all other goals pales in comparison. However, we in the field of economics advice as Adam Smith says "that you should instead seek your own self-interest for the outcome of all people trying to seek their own self-interest will benefit society." Examples its not because friendster.com is benevolent that we are able to connect. They couldn't care about us they just want a higher volume of visits to have more ads - thus they put all sort of benefits to users.

If only Filipino will seek their own interest instead of letting others do it for them our country would have been a better place. Don't worry so much about our society just make yourself a better person and useful professionals. God will take care of the rest.

Pride and Arrogance

Two dangerous things any person could nurture. We are in this earth because of it. Had Lucifer been so kind as to swallow his pride to prostrate to Adam we still be in the Garden of Eden. History is replete with arrogance and pride. The latest of which is the quagmire of the Coalition Forces in Iraq. They are so arrogant of their military might that they did not consider the repercussions of their action. A worst fate befell the Persian Empire, when Genghis Khan send messengers to the Emperor Court the Royal entourage mocked and put to death the poor messengers for demanding something preposterous. They did not listen at all and their pride and arrogance led Genghis Khan to invade them. When they were capture it is said that Genghis Khan pours molten silver and lead into their ears since it’s the only thing they will listen to.

That feeling that we are superior to others because of what we have done and accomplished or that we belong to a certain family, clan, or tribe is one symptom of arrogance. It’s alright to be proud of what we are but to be arrogant that is totally a different story. Worst mistake in history are due to peoples arrogance and pride. Sometimes a rift in relationship will go unhealed for decades and even generation because of pride - it such a big amount to pay for anyone that nurture it.

One way or the other we become a victim of this vices either through boasting and over confidence of what we have especially during time of success. Sometimes things go into our head that our feet leaves the ground and that we feel that we are above everyone else. The only cure to this is to constantly remember that the best among us is those that are best in the eyes of God. Naturally, those who are best in the eyes of God will never admit that they are - since if they do then they wouldn’t be best in the eyes of God.

However, let us not be over humble too or we end up being the same with the person who says “I am the humblest person in the world and in humility nobody can beat me.” Ehem!!! Can you say that again…

Be Happy You're Not Pretty

Excerpt from James F. Bender

Do you sometimes wonder how life could have been better if you are as beautiful as those people you idolize? Wishing you could swap faces with someone very handsome person you admire? If you do, stop pitying yourself – and start pitying the handsome people you envy. They are the ones who are more apt to be hurt in life by their looks.

Most beautiful people have “royalty complex” a feeling that others are there to serve them by virtue of being pretty. As a result they never develop their full potential and often they have unpleasant personality and fragile character. They easily succumb to life trials and often a victim of a broken heart. At the University of California 600 coeds were rated and it shows that plain girls are more successful than their beautiful counterparts. In the US beautiful people are many times over prone to divorce than plain individual.

The only worthwhile beauty a person can have is, in essence, an inner sparkle produced by a combination of strong character and an outgoing approach to life. If you have this sparkle, it will shine through. Youthful handsomeness of features is simply a skin-deep facade that will wilt rapidly with the years; and before wilting it may give you dangerous delusions about yourself. If you acquire the inner sparkle, you will have the best “good looks” anyone can have, regardless of your age or physical makeup.

My Comments

Indeed beauty has its advantage and disadvantage however the disadvantages far outweighs the benefits. No wonder God was so compassionate He created only few beautiful people. In my experience most of the beautiful people I met are hard to get along with. They somehow possess a deficient personality as if they want everything to revolve around them and be the center of attraction. In my decades of academic studies most of those that excel in class are not the so beautiful and during my brief time as a teacher usually the plain coed far exceed the beauties and handsome in class.

I think the problem with beautiful people is their belief that they can always charm their way to success or get what they want. However, they are deceiving themselves since the effect of beauty is temporary and will fade sooner than they expect. True and lasting love is not brought by beauty but rather by the personality of the person we love. We become endeared to another because of the affection and appreciation we experience and not the outward appearance of that person. When beauty becomes the basis of love it is not true love but true lust. Nevertheless, there are rare beauties that are matched by pleasing personality. These are rare gems who never abuse their God given advantage and think of themselves as rather homely.

Random Thoughts

By Ibrahim

There's a point in time when everything becomes meaningless. As if you are in a different dimension of time and space that nothing else really matters. It is a point somehow in our existence that we transcend all bounds of being humans and we see ourselves simply as fashioned clay – a clump of dust nothing more and nothing less. It's a profound experience of emptiness and lack of purpose that this world and everything on it is but a dream, a dream of our own making which value the artificial rather than the eternal.

Weird as it may seems but those are the times I love the most. It gives me that moment to dissect myself and to understand my innermost feelings as individual. Afford me the ability to look at life from beginning to end as if my life has already been lived and what is happening now is but a repetition of that life. Somehow a question of “What’s really important in this life?” lingers on begging to be answered.

Every time I experience these detachments from the life the answer to the question changed. Finally, I come to the conclusion that only important in this life is what we do with our fellow human being. Wadsworth says it better in his poem.

WHAT THE HEART OF THE YOUNG MAN SAID TO THE PSALMIST.
Henry Fellow Wadsworth

Tell me not, in mournful numbers,
Life is but an empty dream!
For the soul is dead that slumbers,
And things are not what they seem.

Life is real! Life is earnest!
And the grave is not its goal;
Dust thou art, to dust returnest,
Was not spoken of the soul.

Not enjoyment, and not sorrow,
Is our destined end or way;
But to act, that each to-morrow
Find us farther than to-day.

Art is long, and Time is fleeting,
And our hearts, though stout and brave,
Still, like muffled drums, are beating
Funeral marches to the grave.

In the world's broad field of battle,
In the bivouac of Life,
Be not like dumb, driven cattle!
Be a hero in the strife!

Trust no Future, howe'er pleasant!
Let the dead Past bury its dead!
Act,--act in the living Present!
Heart within, and God o'erhead!

Lives of great men all remind us
We can make our lives sublime,
And, departing, leave behind us
Footprints on the sands of time;--

Footprints, that perhaps another,
Sailing o'er life's solemn main,
A forlorn and shipwrecked brother,
Seeing, shall take heart again.

Let us, then, be up and doing,
With a heart for any fate;
Still achieving, still pursuing,
Learn to labor and to wait.

Happyness

This is not about the movie by Will Smith. What is happiness? It's a state of being content. How do we achieve it? By undergoing pain and suffering. How come? Aha, this is the purpose of this post to explain what happiness is all about and why do we feel it.

To me happiness is that point of time that you feel alive, that moment where things have meaning, and you are content with what you are. However, happiness can sprung from all sort of things from finding a lost valuables to seeing an old friend. Now there is a very importance concept to remember here. That is before happiness can occur the source of happiness must be absent first. In other words, we have to feel sad or longing for something first before we can be happy.

To illustrate this point, to Muslims they feel so happy during Ramadan at the time they are about to break their fast because for the entire day they have been lacking food and drink, thus at the moment of breaking their fast happiness occurs because the thing that they longed for is finally there. However, this is not the only aspect of it they have also proven to themselves that they are discplined enought to abstain from eating.

There are lots of examples on pain and then happiness such as after exams or during graduation. Here people suffered and sacrificed a lot and be happy in the end - that its finally over. Notice that our happiness in graduation is greater than our happiness in finish a subject. This leads us to think that the greater your suffering and sacrifice the higher the feeling of happiness.

What the hell em I leading to? All I am saying is in this world we cannot be perpetually be happy. That is - it is impossible to be happy all the time. Because happiness connotes the presence of something we value, which were previously not there. Now if everything we value is within reach then we will not value them in the first place. That's why rich people are seldom happy since they are never denied of things. While a poor man will be ecstatic and thankful to eat chicken a rich man won't even finish his meal and never feel any form of thankfulness or happiness.

So Dear Folks, if you are feeling bad or sad you are lucky because happiness is just around the corner while if you are happy beware that sadness is just around the corner. Huh!!!

You may be asking how to get out of the cycle sadness and happiness. It's simple but very hard to do. Acceptance is the key, believing that what had happen is meant to happen and everything is for our own good. I'm not being fatalistic all I mean is that we can rise above our emotion and treat the cycles of life as something we need as human being. On the other hand, there are simple ways to be a bit happy if you are sad. Try doing your laundry or cleaning something - somehow its therapeutic and makes us feel good about ourselves even though nothing have changed.

Procrastination

Procrastination is my sin,
It bring me naught but sorrow,
I know, I must stop it,
In fact I will tomorrow.
-Anonymous

Why do we procrastinate? Well, because we have all the time to do so. But then again we know that we are mortal and soon will be carried to the grave. So this argument doesn’t bode well. My belief is that we procrastinate because we are afraid that once we finish our task we have no other things to do – being human the worst thing that could happen to you is to do nothing. Thus, the saying “If you want things done give it to a busy person.” Because busy person don’t run out of things to do, therefore they don’t have the luxury of procrastination that I and perhaps some of us indulge.

How do you cure procrastination then? Some said “deadline is the best motivator.” Once the deadline nears procrastination seems to disappear. How about lavishing yourself with rewards once things get done. Maybe, especially if you have something to pamper yourself.

If there is something to be blamed for the emergence of procrastination as habit then it’s our civilization. Put it this way, we are hunters and gatherers with animal instinct. We are constantly in search of food there is not time to wait at that time procrastination is not an option. However, as we evolve as society food becomes plenty – thus affording us the time to doze and relax. We lost that instinct that guides all other living things in the planet. Have you ever seen an ant procrastinate or a bee take time to rest. Well, with the exception of the foolish grasshoppers every living thing seems to be busy doing one thing or the other. I think the only remaining instinct that we have is the urge to procreate of which nobody procrastinate.

So the next time you feel procrastinating think of it as way to procreate. You never know the next time you finish at task it may be your masterpiece.